What rough beast…

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Autumn really is my time.

Something incredible happened. Someone has been looking for me, all this time. I never really thought anyone would, which really was a cruel and selfish underestimation of her, I suppose I was confusing her for her mother or her sister. I should have known better.

But she looked for me, and I let her find me, and we are talking again. It’s been a long, long time. I rememeber playing with her back on the property, I remember her monkeys and her friends and her putting up with an annoying- and damaged- little brother. I remember laughing with her, and I have no memory of laughing with any of the rest of them. I missed her terribly, although I was not going to admit that to myself.


She even understands why I left, without my having to say a word about it.

Other things have rolled around for me. I spent a few days with Judy here in my city, where I dragged her around to see the things and places that make this city special to me. It was good to be near her, and good for it to be peaceful. There was some healing and some closure there, and a comfort in knowing that we can be what we are without yanking out each other’s hearts. Things went as they needed to at TES, and a couple of rotten teeth have been pulled. It really was not that hard- nobody who had ever worked with them could tolerate them. It was worth the effort, both for the organization and for me personally.

As far as the newly found good manners- too little, too late.

There are things that still need my attention. I have a career to build and an animal to take care of. There is work to be done and money to be made- but Mother has decided to be generous, and I am grateful for it.


It’s a little after six. My twin has made it home safe, my animal is due home soon.
My efforts have borne fruit, I got to spend some time with Soul and Sir C (Who I do NOT see enough of. We give her a hard time- and bless her icy heart, she lets us- but I have more respect and regard for that beautiful woman than she’s ever gonna understand.) I have touched the hand of my sister, who I love and miss, and am aware of just how good Mother is being right now.

I intend to revel in my life, and be grateful.

“And what rough beast,
It’s hour rolled round at last,
Slouches towards Bethlehem
Waiting to be born?”