It was already Thursday….

…and His Lordship’s artificial limb could not be found.

So goes a favorite panel of mine from the works of Edward Gorey, and so goeth I.

The saga of my ailing right foot is finally at an and, as my right leg now comes to an end just above mid- shin.

Surprisingly, this is a Good Thing.

Now, if I had been a promising olympian athelite- a sprinter, perhaps, or some south american making ridiculous amounts of cash for my ability to kick field goals, this would be a tragedy. However, I am none of these things. I was sentanced to a purgatory, sick and ailing and told that I was not to walk. Now that I think about it, not walking to save a foot does seem a little silly. But it was what I was sentanced to, and over the last few years, I was getting sicker and sicker, fighting off a localized bacteria in that crippled foot that had my immune system worn paper thin keeping it from blossoming into infection. I had grown depressed and exhausted just living, and condemned to being a shut in was not helping anything. So I stayed in, off my foot as much as I could and still stay sane.

I couldn’t even wear my boots, and I think that was not helping my health, mental and otherwise. (Don’t tell me not wearing my boots was not injuring my physical health, if Superman can be hurt being near glowing green gravel, I can waste away without my boots. It could happen.)

Then my little nephews came to visit, bearing the gift of plague, as all kids do, and my immune system was overrun by Xerxes’ hordes of bacteria. I had a fever, and fourty eight hours later Soulhuntre was helping me get to the hospital, where my suddenly inflated foot was drained of about eight or nine gallons of pus. By the time all the doctors were done poking it, it had to go.

Even then, I knew this was a good thing. Get this fucking thing, this albatross, get it the fuck offa me. Give me a nice, modern prosthetic so I can have my fucking life back!

And so they did.

When I woke up, I felt amazing. Removing that source of illness made my whole body one big sigh of relief. A second operation and some weeks later, the whole thing is nearly healed- I am mere weeks from starting prosthetic training.

I am, of course, recovering in another goddamn geriatric facility (Yoo-Hoo) and have only just (thanks again to my droog Ken Soulhuntre, bless his black and bitter heart) gotten back online to rejoin the civilized world; but the end is in sight, a month or so away. 

It’s been a long few months in this place, but with physical therapy and a prosthetic, I am going to walk the fuck outta here this spring.

In my new boots.

Comments

10 responses to “It was already Thursday….”

  1. Yay. Good to see your words back here again.
    Perhaps we can get a mobile Jazz or Samba band to provide some background music to help get you to march outta there! Woot!

  2. dispelling the Throbblefoot Spectre…

    From the time I first heard about your foot – all I could think about was your boots. I had faith that you would recover…I had faith that you would not kill the yoohoo woman – or at least escape the blame for it…but I was desperately worried about you seeing your boots day in and and day out and your foot keeping you from that part of your soul.

    I am SO heart glad to hear YOU again…and that you will have that part of you back.

    “…the grand Panjandrum himself, with the little round button at top, and they all fell to playing the game of catch as catch can till the gunpowder ran out at the heels of their boots.”

  3. Stars of Death stood over us, and innocent Russia squirmed under the bloody boots, under the wheels of black Marias.
    Anna Akhmatova

  4. I’ve always felt that you would be able to overcome this and I’m glad that you are now going to be able to continue your life and with your boots on.

  5. It’s been a long few months in this place, but with physical therapy and a prosthetic, I am going to walk the fuck outta here this spring.

    And then, we hook you up with a little old kung fu master to teach you how to use a clawed dragon foot prosthetic.

  6. Your positive attitude amazes me. You really are incredible, and I admire the way you’ve gotten through all of this with your sense of humor and irony intact.

    Please let me know if you need anything while you’re there. I’m available here on LJ or at my email (suespace74@gmail).

    I’m so glad to read you again, and hope to see you again soon.

  7. Glad to see you back Flagg. It’s great to hear you’ll be kickin’ ass and takin’ names in your boots this spring ๐Ÿ™‚