I don’t have sexual dreams often. Normally I consider them a sort of rare treat.<\/p>\n
Not this time.<\/p>\n
Some twisted neural filament of traitorous, snickering neurons decided to cast the one ex I have whom I would happily beat to death with a barbed wire bat. When I woke up- possibly out of self preservation- I literally cried: I still feel unclean,<\/em> like I should hunt down the throbbing brain cancer responsible for such a thing and correct it’s errant ways with a melon baller and a soldering iron, cleaning up the ruined scoop crater with alcohol and a zippo. Next time, a nice nightmare will do fine, thank you. Bring on the flayed dancers and the tattered gray man in the closet. Bring back the tumor that whispers<\/em>. Bring ’em all back. That would be fine, thank you.<\/p>\n But this was just uncalled for. I mean, really<\/em>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" I don’t have sexual dreams often. Normally I consider them a sort of rare treat. Not this time. Some twisted neural filament of traitorous, snickering neurons decided to cast the one ex I have whom I would happily beat to death with a barbed wire bat. When I woke up- possibly out of self preservation- […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/foolish-house.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/120"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/foolish-house.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/foolish-house.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/foolish-house.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/foolish-house.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=120"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/foolish-house.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/120\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/foolish-house.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=120"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/foolish-house.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=120"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/foolish-house.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=120"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
“Awwwwwwww IIIWWW!”<\/strong><\/em> as if in the dark of night, reaching for a lightswitch, I’d just stuck my hand in a bucketful of slugs.<\/p>\n
I know my subconcious has no particular sense of appropriateness, taste, aesthetics or essential decency… but this was not right<\/em>.<\/p>\n