A break from the usual dark, obtuse entries, because sometimes you have to ask… “Are you crazy? You have GOT to be kidding. I mean- are you for real<\/i>? What are you on<\/b>?”<\/p>\n
It’s been a very stressful month and change. Most of the stress has come directly from the poison pen of some very hurt and angry people. So, I give what slack I can. People act irrationally when they are hurt. But then it suddenly becomes clear that some of them really are<\/b> out of their minds<\/i>. Pain is irrelevant- they are just stark slavering buggo. Barking mad. Fruitbats.<\/p>\n
So, after weeks of vicious, hurtful slander and attacks, I have finally gotten most of my animal’s things out of her ex’s apartment (Which is a story unto itself. Rather than tell it here, I’d recomend the myth of the twelve labors of Hercules- most notably the Augean Stables; the hotel room description in Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas<\/b>, and the poetry of Charles Bukowski. ). However, that stuff was leverage<\/i> for them. It was important to my animal, or we’d have long ago abandoned it, and not had to deal with the horror.
\nBut; while they had it, they had something<\/i>. <\/p>\n
So we dealt with the attacks, we dealt with the slander, I kept silent, bided my time. Even when faced with hypocrisy, denial and outright nuttiness. <\/p>\n
So, early the morning of the move, I was awoken by a phone call from a very dear friend. This woman is loyalty and integrity, wrapped in an exeedingly hot, curvy wrapper and adorned with red lipstick and diamond earrings. For reasons I cannot reason, the ex’s continue to call her, and explain what a terrible creature my animal is. I understand the compulsion which has been driving one of them to yammer slander at everone who wanders into her blast radius- that’s nothing new- but to seek out someone who you know<\/b> does not like you or believe a word you say and try to convince her that her best friend is Satan’s Minion? <\/p>\n
Please.<\/p>\n
Well, this effort ended predictably.
\nEssentially, our friend said:<\/p>\n
“I don’t ever want to hear you spread these lies about my friend again. I don’t ever want to hear that you are telling anyone else <\/b>these lies. This is what I think of you- (insert scathing blast of invective here)<\/b>– and that is exactly what I’ll tell everyone within the sound of my voice should I ever get wind of this kind of shit in the future.”<\/p>\n
Among these colorful descriptions was one word which causes a great deal of controversy in our circles. We’ll call it the A-word<\/i>. This word can be very socially hurtful around these parts. It is what they call “fightin’ words.”<\/i><\/p>\n
When I arrive to pack and pick up the stuff, I am taken aside by one of the two ex’s and treated to the following (paraphrased):<\/p>\n
“Flagg, you know I don’t like you, and you know by now that I have been trashing your name and that of (your animal) to everyone who stands still long enough for me to yammer the story out- but I only say things which are what I perceive your reputation to be anyway<\/b>, so it’s okay.<\/p>\n
But now someone is threatening to say bad things about us<\/b>– not you, but someone you know- and that’s<\/b> not right, and I want you to put a stop to it.”<\/i><\/p>\n
You’re kidding, right?<\/p>\n
But wait, there’s more.<\/p>\n
I get home after moving the stuff out. Now note, with the belongings moved, their leverage is gone. They have no hostage. apparently, the shift in paradigm is recognizable… as a very polite email awaits me. (Paraphrasing), it says:<\/p>\n
“We never said anything bad to you, and have never been vile or hurtful. And maybe someday you’ll recognize how swell we are being and come for dinner; and we like the status quo of giving you shit and never hearing a bad word in return… but that is never going to happen if this person says anything bad about us! If she does… no biscuit for you!”<\/i><\/p>\n
So… to keep the status quo of listening to you slander me and mine, I have to stop a third party from expressing her opinion about you? according to the rules you set down for me, someone else is just talking within your reputation- so that<\/b> can’t be wrong.<\/p>\n
This is a joke, right? You can’t be serious.<\/p>\n
Let’s look at this from a different angle:
\nYou have no leverage. From this point on, the tone and quality of your communications has direct bearing on my\/our bothering to listen. Yes, you have a right to share your feelings- but no, you can’t force me to pay the slightest attention. To put it simply: The amount of attention I pay is directly and inversely proprtional to the unpleasantness of dealing with you. No- one owes you anything for your feelings.<\/b><\/p>\n
On the other hand, there is a third party who is just waiting for you to start screeching again, so she can put what she<\/i> thinks of you out there.
\nNothing to do with me. She’s defending her friend… and will do so in the very fishpond you’ve been so busy pissing in.<\/p>\n
Perhaps you should reconsider your tactics from here on in? Just a thought.<\/p>\n
:shakes head:<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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