{"id":92,"date":"2006-09-02T11:22:00","date_gmt":"2006-09-02T11:22:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/tdgsafety.wordpress.com\/2006\/09\/02\/morgan-sperlock-can-bite-my-wrinkled-grey-ass\/"},"modified":"2006-09-02T11:22:00","modified_gmt":"2006-09-02T11:22:00","slug":"morgan-sperlock-can-bite-my-wrinkled-grey-ass","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/foolish-house.local\/2006\/09\/02\/morgan-sperlock-can-bite-my-wrinkled-grey-ass\/","title":{"rendered":"Morgan Sperlock can bite my wrinkled grey ass."},"content":{"rendered":"

30 Days? Kid stuff. Six weeks.<\/strong> <\/p>\n

So- after surgery, a few things were determined: <\/p>\n

I have to stay off this foot until it heals.
I will need six weeks of IV therapy.
IV therapy at home is hell even with<\/em> help.
Living alone means I cannot <\/em>stay off the foot.
My insurance will not let me stay in the hospital, even if I wanted to. <\/p>\n

The answer? Six weeks of IV therapy in a nursing home<\/strong>.
That’s correct. A geriatric facility, an Old Age Home, a diaper academy.
It’s as surreal as you think. The care is, an many ways, better than the hospital, and I have freedom to move around in my wheelchair, I can even get online from time to time. But the most insidious element is the well meaning conspiracy to steal what dignity I have left. It’s not malicious, it’s habit.<\/em> The staff is utterly conditioned to dealing with folks who can’t clean themselves, feed themselves, or in many cases, express themselves. So I come as a bit of a surprise. <\/p>\n

An attendant points at the “wee- wee pad” which I have removed from my bed, as I have no intention of urinating theon. <\/p>\n

“Do you need that?” <\/p>\n

“No, thanks.”
<\/em>
(pause) <\/p>\n

“You sure?”<\/em> <\/p>\n

“Yes. “
<\/em>
(pause) <\/p>\n

“I can put tht back for you.” <\/p>\n

“No. No, thank you. It’s fine.” <\/p>\n

<\/em>Or the attendant who hovers around to bathe me in the morning. It’s OK, really- the only thing that does not work is the foot. Really. Now go away. <\/p>\n

Soulhuntre suggested I see it as an exercise in accepting service. Were I to do that, in six weeks I would be squeezed out of here a corpulent vegetable, expecting to be fed, groomed, bathed, wiped, and attended in all ways, like Baron Harkonnen wih no power or wealth… just a lump suited for nothing but, perhaps, the Jerry Springer show. <\/p>\n

This is so wrong. My advice: <\/p>\n

Die young.<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

30 Days? Kid stuff. Six weeks. So- after surgery, a few things were determined: I have to stay off this foot until it heals. I will need six weeks of IV therapy. IV therapy at home is hell even with help. Living alone means I cannot stay off the foot. My insurance will not let […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/foolish-house.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/92"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/foolish-house.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/foolish-house.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/foolish-house.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/foolish-house.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=92"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/foolish-house.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/92\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/foolish-house.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=92"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/foolish-house.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=92"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/foolish-house.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=92"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}