Well, more like wheeling and limping. but that’s not the point.
I got the chance to get out with Soulhuntre, Lone Wolf, Njlexi, Tatsumi, Kimiko, and Serafin. We trekked out to see iron Man. The movie was essentially perfect- I loved everything about it- but that that was really secondary to being out, and out with family. The knuckle dragging hordes of slackjawed savages filling the theatre did not even bother me; they just counterpointed how much I was enjoying every person I was with. Soulhuntre and his clan go out of their way to help me deal with my current limitations as a matter of course, somehow treading the fine line of helping me do what I can’t do alone (or at all) without making me feel crippled or diminished.
There is compassion and concern, but no pity.
At dinner, my blood sugar took a plunge. I watched as the table went to a quiet but attentive yellow alert- but they stood down, continued eating and chatting and being themselves and just let me deal with it; without making me feel weak or self conscious. It was a comfort, being allowed and trusted to handle things, that they knew that I knew what to do and how to handle it- but if I had actually had a critical issue, if the word “hospital” had come out of my mouth, I would have been whirled out of there without regard to plans, tickets, or any thing else- such as the unfortunates between our table and my Pack getting me out the door and across the parking lot.
I spent most of the night grinning like an idiot because of where I was and who I was with. I loved the movie too, but that was extra. I was home, where I wanted and needed to be for a while, I felt whole.
I have a few friends I am concerned about- my Pixie, my big newly bionic Silverback, and a distant scottish beast of the mythical persuasion- all are grappling with health or worse, and none are within my immediate ability to help. In some cases I do not even know what to say in the face of the terrible pain that each of them are suffering.
They are all special, and as much as I believe in the idea of “deserve” as a universal fulcrum, they all deserve far, far better.
In every case, I am genuinely blessed to know them at all. they are Pack, no matter where they are.
It is humbling to be reminded to thoroughly how lucky I really am to have all these people in my life.
Comments
5 responses to “Running with the Pack”
It is truly good to read these words. I am very happy for you.
There is compassion and concern, but no pity.
And that makes such a huge difference.
It’s always cheering to know when a friend has had a good time.
This post made me so happy to read. Just wanted to tell you that.
I also loved the movie. ๐
I thought of the other thing I wanted to say. (It’s gala day at work, I’m a bit scatterbrained today…)
You’re not just lucky to have these people in your life. You deserve them. You earned them, by being the person you are. Your relationship with them is a balance of give and take, and a combination of like minds and varied interests. Yes, you are lucky. And so are they.
listening longingly about “pack”
Your post hit quite a note with me. I always read your posts even before you accepted Me as a friend so I could leave comments. I have always had a bit of a crush.. even though some of the things you say make Me crazy.. lol
I am so happy to hear you are out and about and I too loved the movie which we saw this weekend.I could truly feel your comfort as you spoke about your “pack”. I have always had this in My life until now. When I stepped out of My life in Texas and came to New York I left most of My “pack” there but I must say I also have those five or six people that I could call and know they would respond. It’s a lucky thing for you that your pack seems to be close-by. Of those five members of My pack, only one is here in NY. Although I rarely see him, I can read his Live Journal and I usually comment there. Reading your post reminds Me that although “pack” responds when called upon, it should be nurtured. I have been remiss and I think I will make haste to remedy that.
Thanks Flagg and I’m glad you had a a great outing.