Running with the Pack

In The Doubtful Guest by flagg5 Comments

Well, more like wheeling and limping. but that’s not the point.

I got the chance to get out with Soulhuntre, Lone Wolf, Njlexi, Tatsumi, Kimiko, and Serafin. We trekked out to see iron Man. The movie was essentially perfect- I loved everything about it- but that that was really secondary to being out, and out with family. The knuckle dragging hordes of slackjawed savages filling the theatre did not even bother me; they just counterpointed how much I was enjoying every person I was with. Soulhuntre and his clan go out of their way to help me deal with my current limitations as a matter of course, somehow treading the fine line of helping me do what I can’t do alone (or at all) without making me feel crippled or diminished.

There is compassion and concern, but no pity.

At dinner, my blood sugar took a plunge. I watched as the table went to a quiet but attentive yellow alert- but they stood down, continued eating and chatting and being themselves and just let me deal with it; without making me feel weak or self conscious. It was a comfort, being allowed and trusted to handle things, that they knew that I knew what to do and how to handle it- but if I had actually had a critical issue, if the word “hospital” had come out of my mouth, I would have been whirled out of there without regard to plans, tickets, or any thing else-  such as the unfortunates between our table and my Pack getting me out the door and across the parking lot.

I spent most of the night grinning like an idiot because of where I was and who I was with. I loved the movie too, but that was extra. I was home, where I wanted and needed to be for a while, I felt whole.

I have a few friends I am concerned about- my Pixie, my big newly bionic Silverback, and a distant scottish beast of the mythical persuasion- all are grappling with health or worse, and none are within my immediate ability to help. In some cases I do not even know what to say in the face of the terrible pain that each of them are suffering.

They are all special, and as much as I believe in the idea of “deserve” as a universal fulcrum, they all deserve far, far better.

In every case, I am genuinely blessed to know them at all. they are Pack, no matter where they are.

It is humbling to be reminded to thoroughly how lucky I really am to have all these people in my life.